By Helen Clarke
Where Coronation Street is so familiar you know it only as The Street
When the cobbles are always cracked and you know they won’t get mended
When every band that comes to town plays Oasis as tribute
Where Wonderwall rings out from 42s when the night has ended
Why are they always fixing tram lines that were fine to begin with?
Why do 99p drinks mean we’ll go anywhere no matter how ‘angin?
Why do old people move to Fallowfield when they know it’s full of students?
Why do we wait half an hour for a bus and then still thank him?
Where the club nights get rated the worst in Europe
When you can’t walk down Market Street without being asked who does your electricity
Where you listen to obscure music because it’s twelve quid at the academy
When you’re still rooting for the Manc teams no matter how much crap you see
Why do we continue to ignore the homeless population at our door?
Why does it matter whether we go to MMU or Uni of?
Why do we stick up for Salford but refuse to go alone?
Why are we in the library on a Saturday? Well, to charge our phone
Where we used to think the Arndale was an awesome maze of wonder
Where there’s always a smartphone to capture last night’s blunder
Where we call it a shithole but, Christ, we wouldn’t change it
Where we protest any and all Tory plans to rearrange it
Where we protest anything because we’re students and it’s our town
Where we didn’t ride the Manchester Eye before it came down
Where you can buy three coats for a tenner because they’re second hand
Where the music scene flourishes no matter what band
Where the council collecting your bins is considered a grand gesture
Where do you come from? The North? Yeah. Manchester!